jeffersonstarshipshavethetardis:
okay so we know about jesus when he’s a baby, and jesus when he’s an adult, but does the bible ever mention his rebellious teenager years?
‘jesus, go feed the donkey.’
‘yOU’RE NOT MY REAL FATHER’the ground shakes a little, and a voice comes down from the sky
‘do what your stepfather says you little shit’
(via lesrevesdoux)
There once was a young boy with a very bad temper. The boy’s father wanted to teach him a lesson, so he gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper he must hammer a nail into their wooden fence.
On the first day of this lesson, the little boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. He was really mad!
Over the course of the next few weeks, the little boy began to control his temper, so the number of nails that were hammered into the fence dramatically decreased.
It wasn’t long before the little boy discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.
Then, the day finally came when the little boy didn’t lose his temper even once, and he became so proud of himself, he couldn’t wait to tell his father.
Pleased, his father suggested that he now pull out one nail for each day that he could hold his temper.
Several weeks went by and the day finally came when the young boy was able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.
Very gently, the father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.
“You have done very well, my son,” he smiled, “but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same.”
The little boy listened carefully as his father continued to speak.
“When you say things in anger, they leave permanent scars just like these. And no matter how many times you say you’re sorry, the wounds will still be there.”
Whoa
How my kids will learn
(via lesrevesdoux)
The floor of a video game store, it is entirely flat
this would fuck me up
im not ok
Imagine a drunk person walking in there
or your first time getting high and you walk in…
Imagine bring there on acid. Fucking awesomeness would be happening inside my head.
(via lesrevesdoux)
If only all men were like this.
If men were all like this the world population rate would be so slow
There are guys like this you’re just too busy putting them in the fucking friend zone to see that
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
reblog for the comment
Oh hell no you better listen the fuck up dickwads
I was about to go to sleep and then this bullshit showed up on my dash and you have all earned yourselves fedoras so sit down, shut up, and educate your stupid asses.
“Putting them in the friendzone”? I’m sorry did you mean “I was nice to a girl and I cared about her and I’m bitter because she didn’t want me back?” Or was it “I believe that if I love another person they’re a bitch for just wanting to be friends.” Perhaps it was “I treated her (or pretended to, rather) like a person instead of a sexual object and now she’s not being a sexual object for me like I deserve.” No, wait, it’s “friendship with a girl makes me angry because I’m a self-entitled shithead who feels like if I want to be with a girl she has to accept that regardless of her feelings or else she’s a total bitch.”
The friendzone is the concept that a girl wanting to be your friend is somehow this inherently awful thing. Like, wow, did it occur to you that she thought you were, I dunno, FRIENDS? Did it occur to you that maybe she doesn’t feel romantically towards you but she still wants you to be part of her life because she thinks you’re a great person? I mean, if this is your reaction you’re wrong, because if you think friendzoning is a thing then clearly you’re a fucktrumpet but that’s beside the point.
Women are not machines you put niceness coins into until sex comes out. There are no punchcards to fill out to get to sex that you are apparently entitled to.
There is no friendzone, there are only people who don’t know how to behave like they’re not five-year-olds who don’t know how to take “no” for an answer.
Now I’m going to sleep. Disrespectful misogynistic asswagons.
Wow. Fucktrumpet, Asswagons? You are amazing at swearing. Like seriously amazing.
FUCKTRUMPET.
Women are not machines you put niceness coins into until sex comes out.
HOLY FUCK I LOVE YOU
everyone better read that long amazing comment!!!!!!!OMG REBLOGGING FOR THAT COMMENT/SPEECH/GENIUS OMFG I LOVE YOU
(via lesrevesdoux)
I’m not satanic but these are some damn good rules.
satan does not support rape, animal cruelty, or child abuse
when walking in open territory, bother no one. if someone bothers you, ask them to stop. if they do not stop, destroy them.
*Today on I Didn’t Know I was a Satanist*
I agree with all of these rules…I’m really uncomfortable now
(Source: theblood-thesweat-thebeers, via lesrevesdoux)
One day we’ll be in a Marvel movie, sitting there as something doesn’t feel right. and as the credits start to roll we’ll know what it is. It will flash up on screen and our hearts will break. “In loving memory of Stan Lee”. There was no cameo in that movie. And there never will be again.
(via lesrevesdoux)
you came to the wrong neigh-bourhood, motherfucker
THE FUCKING DOG I CANT BREAHE
JESUS
(Source: voldegort, via lesrevesdoux)